Columbus and the ugly mermaids.
Apparently the famous explorer Christopher Columbus, saw mermaids off the coast of Haiti and thought they were ugly. He wrote in his journal that the mermaids were “not as pretty as they are depicted,” and “for somehow in the face they look like men.”
I’m not sure why this cracks me up so much. Maybe I imagine the incident with Chris and his mates going something like this …
First Mate: Captain we’ve sighted some mermaids off the port bow.
Columbus: We must investigate these creatures. [He thinks: I've been out to sea for a long time, even a half fish, half women sounds good right now].
First Mate: Aye, aye captain!
Columbus: [As the boat pulls up next to the mermaids] Ahoy there queens of the sea. It is I the great explorer of the world Christopher Columbus.
Mermaids: [They all turn around to see Chris and his boys]
Columbus: [Gulps back a cry of disgust] Uh … hi. Uh … we have to get going now. Running low on oranges and all. Can’t have scurvy you know. Good day now.
Columbus: [To first mate] Maybe we can find some sirens?
It’s even funnier when you know that scientists think that ol’ Chris probably mistook manatees for mermaids.
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or perhaps he saw some REALLY ugly haitian women going for a swim….